There are many fraud-related crimes we hear about, and some people who experience this themselves. Frauds like romance scam, telephone scam or identity theft. Such scams usually involve deception, menace, manipulation, and sometimes coercion. which causes the victim to lose money, assets, and other material things to the point of ruin. Some would say the mental effects this can cause are even more detrimental. A person who has fallen in to such a trap is likely to be left feeling embarrassed, ashamed and even unworthy to find a true connection especially regarding romance fraud.
Among these fraudulent incidents, I think the worst is the ones involving a conman. But I believe the victims also are partly to blame for being fooled.
Buddhism says that there are 5 main desires for humans:
Desire for food.
Greed for money.
Sexual desire.
Hunger for fame.
Desire to sleep, in other words, desire to have an easy life.
Generally, these desires can help us move forward. But, as it is human nature, the more we have, the more we become unhappy. Very strong desires come easily with greed, and it blinds people. As a result, this desire can destroy a once happy life.
A simple example is when meeting someone in dating apps. A woman tends to choose a guy with a lucrative job. A woman who is blinded by the site of money is more likely to be deceived, causing her to lose her own money as opposed to gaining a more luxurious lifestyle. This scenario shows greed for money. With a strong desire for material things, she gets blinded and fixated on other’s money or property to the point that she loses rationality and falls victim to the fraud.
We are all guilty of having desires that may not result in healthy decisions. In general we should be accountable for our actions and not give in to temptation as well as keep our eyes open to see red flags. Don’t idolise a man because he drives a Bentley or invest in a deal because they promised us we will make double the profits. Let’s not buy the £100 Gucci bag because he said it was real. We are all capable of making these mistakes and some will say you haven’t lived until you have.
Another example, which most commonly occurs among men, is sexual desire. An unequal, yet very beautiful woman approaches a man just for money, but the man is unable to accept the true reason behind her intentions due to his strong sexual desire, and in the end falls prey to the gold digger.
The last example is “earning profit” or “getting your money back” scam. This is a scam too obvious but someone who is strongly fixated on getting profit the shortest and easiest way ignores all the warning signs and just goes ahead with it. In the end, he/she loses everything. As they say in business, “If something is too good to be true, it probably is”. This quote is often forgotten by people who are lured by huge potential returns.
Once we realize the dark side of the desire, we will gain more knowledge and wisdom to avoid the risk. We are able to open our eyes and think rationally. However, as long as we are addicted to something or have a too strong desire for something, we can’t protect ourselves.
In conclusion, we should learn to be satisfied and happy with what we have.
It is healthy to set goals in your life and strive for more, as long as you keep yourself grounded to the knowledge of such risky desires.
Then, you can find where landmines are buried.
Photo: Need to look at myself with an objective eye